Good Morning Girls

So I have begun following an encouraging blog site called Good Morning Girls. I struggle opening up my Bible, diving into my devotional, Jesus Calling. As I was sharing this "lack of motivation" with a friend last week she mentioned how VITAL scripture and prayer is to my battle each day...the battle to remain upright and fight the day despite whatever emotions arise. It is exhausting and most days I come home and become lifeless until bedtime.

I used to wake up at 6am, rip-roaring ready to go! Now I wake up at 6am and have to take a mid-early morning nap around 7am. My energy is spent and my body craves the horizontal position. My days are packed full of intense scheduling, which allows for lots of process time! I am definitely living out the "grieving cycle."

But back to the blog Good Morning Girls.....I stole the following from one of the writers (Whitney). I found so much comfort in the post and it surely normalized my experiences and emotions right now. Daily I feel inadequate, messy, and as if i'm falling apart!! Eek!

The good about not having it all together?

My dependence is greater.

My priorities are refigured.

My will is broken.

My heart is made tender.

My compassion grows stronger.

My ministry becomes more effective.

God shines brighter… for my good, and His glory.

I’ve learned over the years that all-together people don’t exist. And I’ve also learned that even if they did, I don’t want to be one of them. In my weakness, I’ve seen more of Christ, and He is more beautiful than before. I’ve watched Him weave this grace-laced story – messy and twisted underneath - into a magnificent, intentional and clearer presentation for the world to see more of Jesus in me. I’ve learned that the world doesn’t need one more fake all-together Jesus-follower. The world just needs Jesus.

So mold me to be more like you, Father. Whatever it takes. Because nothing escapes your reach, my confidence is in You. Shine brighter, for my good, and Your glory.

“For we do not have a high priest who is unable to empathize with our weaknesses,

but we have one who has been tempted in every way, just as we are—yet he did not sin. 

Let us then approach God’s throne of grace with confidence,

so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help us in our time of need.”

~ Hebrews 4:15-16