Thursday, December 6, 2012

Grad School Paper # 3


What five principles or values should govern human existence, including choices and behavior?
            It is hard to tell how well a building could withstand a storm by just looking at the walls, for the durability and strength is found in its foundation. This is similar to life. How we treat others, what we accomplish, and the choices we make are not only found in what we do, but also in who we. We are so driven by who we are and what we believe, which are the principles we live by. This is our foundation. Is it durable and strong? Will it withstand a storm? Principles give us direction no matter what circumstance we are in. They are a set of values we base our choices and behaviors on and will ultimately persuade our direction.
            It is our principles and values that keep our choices and behaviors in check. Let me again reiterate the imperfection of human existence, and without founding principles it makes it hard to strive for excellence. It also makes it difficult to align our character with a moral set of beliefs. A few years back I was encouraged to sit down and write out the principles that guide my life. My personal philosophy has aided in the development of the five principles that I think govern human existence. These five principles shape our behavior, the choices we make, and, inevitably, the consequences that may or may not follow. After much thought, I have concluded that the five main principles which govern human existence are: honesty, treating people right no matter how they are treating you, using our strengths to help others with their weaknesses, equality, and keeping promises, commitments, and agreements.
            It is easy to say, “I am honest.” But is it as easy to tell the truth in a dire situation when our life is on the line? Honesty is the act of being truthful and sincere, and it is the freedom from deceit or fraud. It is also the quickest way to determine one’s character, with character being all we really have when it comes right down to it. Staying truthful to oneself and to others allows for natural responsibility. As imperfect humans, we must be willing to accept the responsibility that complete honesty will bring.
            Treat people right no matter how they treat you. It is impossible to control other peoples’ behavior, for the only behaviors we can control are our own. Because of the freedom we have to control ourselves, we can freely change how we react to people who mistreat us, and we can chose to make the right choice each time. Do not pursue retaliation, but instead pursue reconciliation. People are going to slip up and do us harm, especially close family and friends. Grace and forgiveness would not exist if we reacted and got back at everyone for how they have treated us. Overall, if the human race would just assimilate and accommodate the phrase that life is not “tit-for-tat,” there would be more peaceful and compassionate people in our world, making healthy choices for themselves and others.
            We all have different strong points, which inevitably are someone else’s weak points. Therefore, we need to use our strengths to help others with their weaknesses. If we were all designed to be exactly alike, then uniqueness, character, and personality would not exist. Instead, we were created with strengths that are most likely our neighbors’ weaknesses. What good are my strengths that only benefit me? Do I use them to benefit those around me? Or do I selfishly harbor my strengths? I believe that our world was created to resemble a large puzzle, and we are the puzzle pieces. It could be a better place if we all chose to support and encourage those around us. In summary, take what we were given and give to others so that they may join us on the journey of success.
            Equality means that no one person is better than anyone else. Equality does not mean we are all the same, for no two people are alike. Piggybacking off of the above principle is the idea that we were all created differently and uniquely: in color and style, financially, emotionally, and physically. However, the common denominators holding us together are that we are all human beings and we all have life. Do not fall into the trap of treating some people better than others. We all deserve to be treated with dignity and respect, which will result in an equal society. The principle of equality largely governs behavior and choice. If we look at individuals through this pristine type of lens, it can change the way we treat them, talk to them, and look at them. Equality is something our country has been striving for long before the MLK Jr. revolution fifty years ago, so let us continue forth with the same goal.
            Lastly, I think it is important to keep promises, commitments, and agreements. Our society is founded on written and unwritten laws. If we break a law we naturally wreak the consequences, whether that be something as extreme as a life sentence or as small as a small fine. The same should apply to everyday life. When we fail to keep a promise, it communicates our lack of care. We have ultimately elected to place something else ahead of the commitment we made, which can result in an erosion of respect and trust in our relationships. Similarly to the first principle of honesty, our behavior towards people and the agreements we make reflect our character. Do we care enough about others to stay true to our word? That is the message portrayed when we do not do what we say we will do. Do not short-circuit success.
            In conclusion, I hold true to these five basic principles of human existence. Each of them shape and define character and behavior, and influence the choices we make. It is our daily responsibility to be open and honest, treat others right, use and abuse our strengths, share equality, and keep promises. I value human life and I value the freedom I have in this country. However, only through how I live my life can I that expose the principles I have.
            

Thursday, November 22, 2012

Happy Thanksgiving 2012

I couldn't have said it better than Jillian Michaels (yes..I am obsessed with her!).....bottom line......be good to yourself this holiday season!

"Today is Thanksgiving, and I want you take a new twist on it this year. Be thankful for YOU, and how far you've come so far in your journey. Give yourself some props! If you're like me, you spend so much time throughout the year struggling with the day-to-day stuff. Then, come holiday time, when we should be celebrating, we're so tired we can barely get through the day! Listen, you know how much I love pushing you guys to the max, but the whole reason I do what I do is so that people can realize their full potential and be the best that they can possibly be.

So I'm going to keep this holiday note short and sweet (well, to the point at least). Today, and for these next few hectic weeks, look past the calories and exercise for once and focus on the real stuff. This is your life...your life! How far are you really going to go with an amazing body but zero confidence? Start working on the attitude to match the effort you're putting into this.

Lack of self-worth is one of the main factors that makes so many people unhealthy and unhappy. For once in your life, make a choice to NOT let yourself be part of that statistic. If you don't like the situation you're in, then change it! Head for a healthy vacation instead of a stressful family reunion if you know it will knock you down a couple rungs on your ladder. Opt for a night out dancing with friends instead of going to another holiday party, laden with temptation and obligation. Make it a point to surround yourself with positive, strong people instead of allowing the same old naysayers continue to beat you down with their negative energies.

Look, I know this might seem like a lot but think about it this way: Holiday after holiday, people are STILL making and throwing away the same resolutions. Happens every year, time and time again. Isn't it time to finally step up to the plate and make a real difference for yourself? So, in honor of the holiday season, celebrate you for once. Work hard, love hard and be happy. Make it so that, at the end of your days, you have something incredible to look back on. You're the only one who can make that happen. And you can be mighty thankful for that." 

- Jillian Michaels

Monday, November 19, 2012

Grad Paper Paper # 2


What is/are the sources and causes of human problems and dysfunctional behavior?
            This question has required a lot of thought and self-reflection. As I would like to naïvely believe that humans are perfect and pristine beings, I get real with myself when I admit that they are not. Herein lies one of the many causes of human problems. We were created perfect and blameless until sin entered the world. “Therefore, just as sin entered the world through one man, and death through sin, and in this way death came to all people, because all sinned (Romans 5:12-21, NIV).” I believe through faith that this lays the foundation not only for human problems but also for dysfunctional behavior. All imperfections, biological and emotional, which drive the decisions we make, stem from the fall of man.
            Sin has created immoral temptations, which are the perpetrator for the selfish pleasures and desires of human beings. We long for satisfaction and do not mind instant gratification every now and then. Some acts are stimulated through our need for survival. For example, “I am starving so I am going to find whatever food I can right now,” or, “I am cold. Whoever’s coat this, is I am going to take it for a bit so I can warm up.” These selfish needs do their job to keep us alive and well. However, the selfish need for alcohol and drugs, as a result of craving satisfaction, are damaging to the individual and his/her biological development and immediate environment. Following the fulfillment of these satisfactions are the poor choices made while under the influence. It is with these choices that come human problems and dysfunctional behavior. Selfish desires and pleasures are found in everyone; however, it is all weighted on how we respond to those cravings.
            Aside from our innate selfishness, we have imperfections and weaknesses. An Adlerian therapist would describe the process as being inferior and seeking superiority. To compensate for our weaknesses, we strive for perfection but always seem to fall short. In some, their strife for perfection revolves around getting good grades, achieving athletic success, or attaining a waist that is a size zero. Others, however, steal, lie, and cheat in order to achieve financial success/comfort, satisfaction in a relationship, or maybe to just appear materialistically perfect. Imperfections can cause a great deal of discontent. When we see something we do not like in ourselves, we can do one of many things: accept it, use it to strengthen and grow us, project it onto others, or in a more extreme case, get bitter or angry and make poor choices to counteract the uncomfortable feeling. This war within us will most likely turn outward and be reflected through behaviors. Our society is a collection of good and bad, strengths and weakness. Do we start a battle with those around us as a means of coping with what we see in ourselves that we do not like? Do we turn to alcohol, drugs, gambling, or other addictions to soothe our cravings? If not dealt with properly, imperfections and weaknesses can be a source of human problems and dysfunctional behavior.
            Lastly, individual or societal differences can lead to problems. What one person may consider as a golden opportunity, another may consider as a threat. It is our perceptions about the world and how we make sense of it all that differ, and when two opposing perceptions clash a conflict will arise. We go to war to defend and protect our ideas and beliefs. If we all held the same ideas and saw situations identically we would have no reason to go up against each other. We would all see eye to eye and problems would not arise. I appreciate the uniqueness in each person and every country, for it keeps our world vivid, lively, and not boring. What I think is beautiful might be garbage to someone else. Am I willing to fight enough for such a belief to outwardly try and change the other individuals’ opinions? Not necessarily, but someone else may choose to negatively display behaviors, while making poor choices in the process, in order to reach an agreement.
           In conclusion, I believe we were intricately designed by God to have a heartbeat, a laugh, and a smile. This allows us to separate ourselves as a human race based on characteristics not known to other species. Historically, I believe that over hundreds and hundreds of years our society has molded itself into what it is today, for that is how we got to this place in time. The strength of specific individuals, for example MLK Jr., has enabled us to have more freedom as humans, and it is with that freedom that we can serve our Creator, which is our sole purpose and meaning in life.

Monday, October 22, 2012

Grad School Paper #1


What does it mean to be human, how did we get here, and what is the essential meaning/purpose of life (if such exists)?
It is not everyday that I stop to wonder how I got here, to this place in time, and what it means to be human. If I were to be honest with myself, I would admit to having wrestled quite a bit with my responses. It is natural to wonder where we as humans came from, and at some point, we all ask ourselves what the meaning of life is. Whether we are persuaded strictly by science or our faith is in a higher power, we should be grounded in a belief that explains what we are doing here on Earth and how we got here.
            I believe there are many facets contributing to the definition of ‘being human.’  What separates us from other warm-blooded mammals is that we have emotions, feelings, thoughts, and pains (physically and emotionally). We can experience laughter through bellyaching sounds, sorrow through tears, and anger through a nasty scowl or frown. These alone are significant characteristics that classify us as part of the human race. As well, we have a heartbeat. Humans make mistakes, have strengths and weaknesses, and seek to find accepting relationships. We long for what we were created for, which is community and love. I believe that these unique traits are what make us human because other species do not display them as uniquely as we do. My dog Luna is unable to laugh out loud or tell me what her strengths and weaknesses are. She can love and be adorable, but I believe she was created solely for me to love. This allows us as humans to distinguish ourselves easily from other breathing creatures.
As an individual who puts her faith in God, through the Christian religion, I am guided by Biblical history when I answer the question as to how we got here. I believe that the world and it’s universe was brought into existence approximately 5,000 years ago by God’s skillful hands. He created man and woman blameless and sinless until man fell and brought down all of creation with him. It is now that we live in a fallen and sinful world with a continuous fight between good and evil. We all desire the good and pure life but cannot obtain perfection. I believe that we are where we are today through history’s turn of events. If we look historically at the past couple hundreds of years we see events that have bettered and worsened our society. Slaves were freed, allowing the chance for better lifestyles. There was the division of church and state, causing a major separation of people. Martin Luther King Jr. started the movement that all blacks and whites are to be treated as equals. Technology advanced. Jobs were created and jobs have also diminished, such as factory work and hard physical labor. And it is through these major historical events that our society has been shaped and challenged. With each tick on the timeline came new challenges, but only to strengthen us as the human race.
When asked what the essential meaning of life is I can’t help but jump right into my faith and what I believe as a Christian. The secular world tells us that we should strive for and attain wealth, fame, and popularity. The ‘white picket fence’ life is coveted because it represents completion and perfection. However, I believe we as humans are here on Earth to serve a different purpose. And I believe what I believe because of the strong personal relationship I have found in Christ Jesus. Life can only have a meaning if we were created for a purpose. My purpose, which I believe everyone to have been created for this purpose, is to have a relationship with our Creator, God. We were designed to worship Him daily in all that we do; this was His purpose in creating us and this is why He sent His Son to die on the cross, so that we could live in His grace and forgiveness. Humans were created to learn of God, commune with Him, spend time in His word, and obey Him. I also believe, as written in scriptures, that we were created to serve Him by serving others. It is through service and worship that we can express the greater love that comes only from God.
In conclusion, I believe we were intricately designed by God to have a heartbeat, a laugh, and a smile. This allows us to separate ourselves as a human race based on characteristics not known to other species. Historically, I believe that over hundreds and hundreds of years our society has molded itself into what it is today, for that is how we got to this place in time. The strength of specific individuals, for example MLK Jr., has entitled us to more freedom as humans, and it is with that freedom that we can serve our Creator, which is our sole purpose and meaning in life. 

Tuesday, September 25, 2012

2-for-1 Deal

Today my readers get a 2 for 1 deal.  Two blog posts in one day.  I guess it is only a deal if people actually read what I write.  If no one does, whelp, I guess it can't be considered a deal. 

Life is in transition right now.  Let the hellos and goodbyes begin at the exact same time!  I wish I had a better grasp on the unfamiliar but I don't think as much growth would come out of that.  So, I am trying to embrace what I don't know with strength and dignity...and let me be honest...it's not easy.  I am routine's number one fan!  I love knowing what each day is going to look like, who I am going to see, what appointments I am going to have, and what I have to get done by dusk.  Tomorrow starts the first day of unknowns: my first day of graduate school.  I feel like a tiny 17-year-old again before her first day of college.  The feelings of anxiety and nerves are back and they are back with vengeance!  I will be drugging myself in order to sleep tonight :]  ZZzzzzz……

I have my map of the campus, my bus route schedule, backpack, books, and compass!
EWU Eagles here I come!!!
(just kidding on the whole compass idea.  i am not going to be 'that new girl with the compass')

Smile

Smiling has never come naturally to me.  As a child I always heard, "Megan, smile for the camera!....MEGAN....SMILE FOR THE CAMERA....please?"  My poor parents.  They probably thought they had a child who was going to grow up and become professionally angry.  Well, guess again Mom and Dad, because I am a happy individual, however I need the reminder to smile every once in a while to let others in on my secret happiness.  A smile shares a story.  It lets others know you notice them.  And part of marriage is letting your spouse know they don't go unnoticed.

Smiles spread happiness. Smiles have even been shown to create happiness. Smiles are contagious. And a smile makes any woman more beautiful.

Thursday, September 20, 2012

Be Thankful

"give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus."
1 Thessalonians 5:18

"always giving thanks to God the Father for everything, in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ."
Ephesian 5:20

Cultivate an attitude of gratitude. Don’t take your husband for granted. Be appreciative for everything he does for you, whether big or small. Always say thank you.

And by golly!  Let me tell you what he has done for me this week!  Monday I had a terrible horrible no good very bad day.  After work I came home to a boquet of flowers and Reese's Pieces.  It reminded me that he is my biggest fan!  And then yesterday, after he had an extremely busy day, came home to quickly get a casserole together and in the oven so that dinner would be ready when I got off work.  And it was YUMMY!  And how could I forget the small stuff he does to bring a smile to my face...like pick up his dirty socks :]

Tuesday, September 18, 2012

Don't Nag

Your husband is a grown man, so don’t treat him like a two-year-old. Leave room for God to work. You are not the Holy Spirit, so do not try to do His job.

hahaha, didn't even need to change a word of what was said.  well said.  haha...made me giggle because it's so true.

Monday, September 17, 2012

Prayer

"Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.  And the peace of God,which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus."
Philippians 4:6-7

"Pray continually..."
1 Thessalonians 5:17

Ruth Graham advises wives to “tell your mate the positive, and tell God the negative.” Take your concerns to God. Faithfully lift up your husband in prayer every day, and you will likely notice a transformation not only in him, but in yourself, as well. 

I used to be in a good routine of prayer.  When I worked at the middle school, with a 30 minute commute, I would pray all the way to work.  I wouldn't even turn on my radio.  I would pray for Craig and our marriage and those who came to mind.  I am out of a routine now and in a time of transition.  No excuses though.  Prayer changes things.  Prayer strengthens things.

Saturday, September 15, 2012

Good Points


"Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things."
Philippians 4:8


Bring about the positive in others.  Emphasize others' good points, not their flaws.  We all have flaws so why bring spotlight to them?  We don't want others to do that of us.  Let's be honest, dwelling on faults will only make us both miserable.  Choose instead to focus on those qualities that you most admire.

Thursday, September 13, 2012

Don't Interrupt

Okay, so I am actually trying to put into practice what I write about for the next 25 days.  It's not easy being pushed around by truth but as I have learned from Mark Driscoll, take one day at a time, issue by issue.  I get too overwhelmed with how screwed up and sinful (althought covered by grace) I am as a wife and friend.  But it is through each conversation I have and every interaction that I remind myself of things I have focused on.  And it starts with one truth a day.

Today, don't interrupt!  I am convicted daily of "listening" to others while thinking of what I'm going to say next OR what I am going to make for dinner.  Have you ever been around a person who won’t let you finish a sentence? That gets old fast. Even if you think you already know what your husband is going to say, allowing him to say it without cutting him off mid-sentence shows both respect and common courtesy.

Wednesday, September 12, 2012

Undivided Attention

Give Undivided Attention

Yes, I know that women are masters of multi-tasking, but when your husband is speaking to you, make a point to lay other tasks aside, look into his eyes, and listen to what he is saying with the goal of understanding and remembering his words.

Tuesday, September 11, 2012

Honor

"...not looking to your own interests but each of you to the interests of other"
Philippians 2:4

Today is a smack over the head and surely a kick in the rear.  Honor others who are placed in my life as authority before my selfish ways.  More specifically...Craigaroo!  I am hard headed when it comes to decision making.  It usually turns out to be a "my way or the highway" type deal (but not that extreme).  I need to give more weight to what he thinks and consider his wishes before my own.  As well, I need to respect supervisors, professors, etc., because of their positions, for that is what the Lord calls us to do.  Ouch.  That hurt.

Monday, September 10, 2012

JOY

"Rejoice always..."
1 Thessalonians 5:16

"Rejoice in the Lord always; again I will say, Rejoice."
Philippians 4:4

Today I choose joy.  I will focus on His strength within me, especially when trials turn my way.  I pray for a song in my heart and a smile on my face.  A happy wife makes a happy life.  I won't use moodiness to manipulate, but in all things I will rejoice, because that's the right thing to do and because it pleases the Lord.

Monday, September 3, 2012

Ordinary Miracle

I think this is my new favorite old song...

Ordinary Miracle
by Sarah McLachlan

It's not that unusualWhen everything is beautifulIt's just another ordinary miracle today
The sky knows when it's time to snowDon't need to teach a seed to growIt's just another ordinary miracle today
Life is like a gift they sayWrapped up for you everydayOpen up and find a wayTo give some of your own
Isn't it remarkableLike every time a raindrop fallsIt's just another ordinary miracle today
Birds in winter have their flingWill always make it home by springIt's just another ordinary miracle today
When you wake up everydayPlease don't throw your dreams awayHold them close to your heart'Cause we're all a part of the ordinary miracle
Ordinary miracleDo you want to see a miracle?
It seems so exceptionalThe things just work out after allIt's just another ordinary miracle today
Sun comes up and shines so brightAnd disappears again at nightIt's just another ordinary miracle today
It's just another ordinary miracle today